Here at JoyBear we see a world where sex is positive and not taboo. It’s why we produce erotic films with a more natural approach to sex. I personally believe that mainstream porn has a lot to answer for when it comes to difficulties around sex, especially in younger generations. All too often people do what they think is 'expected' of them in bed, and this coupled with the stigma of talking openly about our sexual likes and dislikes can mean that although we are having sex, we aren't always having fun.

We all know the Hollywood stereotypical sex scene - flatteringly lit, bodies moving in a perfectly choreographed manner (usually unattainably 'perfect' bodies of course), no slipping off the side of the bed, no getting tangled in your underwear, and most definitely no mess. 

Pictured - Loveday and Chris Cobalt in Just Roll With It. It's not always that easy to undress each other is it?

Then there's mainstream porn made primarily for the male gaze. The men can last for ages. The women are willing and melt at the merest touch. Penetration is the main event (foreplay is optional) usually hard and fast. The man's climax signals the end. We're usually left uncertain about the women's climax but she certainly makes some noises. 

Of course this doesn't apply to every scene, but I am sure you're aware of this type of film as well as others that really make no effort at all to ensure the woman is at least enjoying herself.

As depressing as these type of scenes are, it's also encouraging to see the sort of new content that is being produced in the past number of years. Porn for women is now a thing with studios catering solely to this market, although it's definitely not just women who are watching more realistic, inclusive and non mainstream content. Huge steps in the right direction and JoyBear is proud to be a part of this movement.

Because while most porn shouldn't be used as a handbook for sex, where does our sexual education come from? Parents, school, friends, trial and error?

I have a very strong memory of a Sex Ed class at school when I was 14 or 15. Our teacher told us that if we didn't like wet and stickiness then we probably wouldn't like sex. At the time all of us giggled nervously, nobody had anything to add to that revelation! I can't remember the rest of that class but the wet and sticky comment has stayed with me, for several reasons. At the time, pure shock, and then eventually realisation of the brilliant candour of it. After all, why shouldn't young people get taught about the less Hollywood aspects of real sex? About women's arousal leading to wetness? About the realities of semen?

But of course most school Sex Ed confines itself to birth control, STDs and condoms on bananas. Which are all well and good but a little more realistic information would certainly help.

Sex is sometimes funny and not always perfect. We love that at JoyBear. It’s why we often leave these little moments in our films. You'll also notice some of the intense and 100% real climaxes of our performers, and the fact that we place a big emphasis on foreplay. Because yes, our films are fun fantasies, but even in a fantasy we believe that you can send a sex positive message.

In life nobody wants to be the brunt of an 'expectation vs reality' joke. But we have to question where our expectations come from what what sort of conditioning has led us to practice certain behaviours, or do things because we think we should. Sex should be about pleasure, and the easiest way to get there is through consent, communication and a sense of humour. Because lets face it, with sex, too many expectations can just leave you uncomfortable, unsatisfied and unhappy. If you've ever tried to have romantic sex on a beach then you'll know this feeling!

So lets hear it for realness, laugh when your sock won't come off. Tell your partner what you're enjoying, and ask them to let you know what they like. Choreographed candlelit film sex is all well and good, but we all know the sweaty, wet and sticky sessions are the ones with the earth suddering orgasms...

Stay safe. Have fun. Issy x