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8 Great Oral Tips posted on 26th February 2021

8 best cunnilingus tips to try...

Cunnilingus. Pussy licking. It can be absolutely amazing or just awkward for everyone involved. For those without a vulva, going down and trying to pleasure one can be confusing and also worrying. What should you do? How can I make sure that I am pleasuring this person? Here at Joybear we want to help everyone be better at sex, so with this in mind here's 8 great oral tips to try on those with a vulva...

1. Consent and communication. Remember that consent is sexy and communication is key. I say this a lot on my posts but I think it bears repeating often. Communication as you go along will help to take any sexual encounter from 'meh' to amaaazing. Don't be afraid to ask if what you're doing feels good. Don't be afraid to guide your partner. If you find it difficult to voice your needs then you can set up other ways of communication, for example ask your oral receiver to pull your hair gently when it feels good.

2. Slow it down. Generally it's best to build up touch slowly. Of course sometime a passionate encounter may move fast, but starting slow and going from there is always a good place to begin from. Think of it as a fun make-out session and take your time. Studies have found that those with vulvas can take between 20-45 minutes to orgasm, so slow it down. You don't have to go straight for the clitoris! Light kisses and licks on the inside of the thighs can feel amazing. Kiss the labia and slowly work your way to the clitoris.

3. Use your hands. Stroke your partner, tweak or tease their nipples, hold their hips or even apply gentle pressure on top of the pubic bone. Let their moans and movements guide you.

4. Clit action... The clitoris sits at the top where the two inner labia join. Every vulva is different and every person finds different things pleasurable. Experiment with different rhythms and pressure. Start gently and go from there. Slow licks like you would on an ice cream can be a great place to start. From there you can try different techniques such as:

- Circles - try both ways
- Up and down
- Side to side - you can also position yourself sideways, see my post on the Kivin Method here
- Pulsating
- Light sucking

Remember that everyone is different. For some people direct stimulation is too much. Be guided by your partner.

4. Try different positions. Face sitting, 69, raising their hips up on a pillow. Get creative...

5. Tell them that you love the way they taste. Making your partner feel at ease is one of the most powerful things you can do. Everyone tastes different and some people are insecure about their taste and smell. As a vulva owner I can attest that this is one of the sexiest things that you can hear when someone goes down on you.

6. Penetration. You can use your fingers or a sex toy. Ask your partner and start gently. The G-spot and other erogenous zones can be found inside the vagina, find out more here.

7. When you find what they like, keep at it. For most, an orgasm requires constant repetitive motions, so if your partner is moaning, arching their back and / or pushing against you then it could be that you've found the ideal pressure and motion, so don't change it. Unless they tell you to of course.

8. Multiple orgasms. For some, one orgasm doesn't have to be it... Be mindful that the clitoris can be extremely sensitive just after an orgasm, but also consider carrying on and taking your partner into the realms of multiples, if they are up for it. 

I would love to hear your favourite oral tips... Let me know in the comments or on Twitter.

Stay safe. Have fun. Issy x

Pictured - Alyssia Kent and Juan Lucho, Nat Portnoy and Jesus Reyes, Julia Roca and Baby Nicols, all from Love is Blind



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